Estranged, Chapter 7: A Visit from S.H.I.E.L.D.

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Author’s Note: There has been a time jump, about a year after Loki’s arrival on Earth. Loki and Rowan recently became engaged, and Rowan is pregnant—about 3 months along.

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“So, what do you think about all day?” Loki had a good idea of what the fawn-colored greyhound strolling at his heels would think. ”‘This couch is soft. Scratch my ears. Can we go for a walk? Where’s Rowan?’ Such a simple creature. You live in the moment and care not that the world continues to turn unless it interrupts your dinner.”

Loki smiled and adjusted his hold on Athena’s leash as he leisurely walked her along the sidewalk dividing the park from the harbor. He and Rowan had purchased the hound several weeks ago during the summer. She was a rescue dog—easy-going and lazy, but being a sighthound meant she had a sharp eye for small moving objects. A leash was necessary unless he wanted to chase a dog capable of running 40mph. He was thankful for the lack of squirrels in the park.

Loki strode into the park proper and admired the fountain as he passed. It had grown too chilly for children to play in it as they had all summer long; school had begun weeks ago leaving the parks and sidewalks lonely once again during the day.

Summer had ushered in a flurry of activity for him. In June Rowan discovered she was pregnant. Inwardly Loki had been beside himself with joy at the notion of becoming a father. Being a planner, he had already begun researching the best schools and educational opportunities available. Rowan only laughed and left him to it while she took time to learn about pregnancy and nutrition; she had been surprised at how little she actually knew about it. Shame on her parents for their lack of proper education.

And of course June had signaled the end of the school year which meant every public place—parks, libraries, grocery stores, and businesses—were crawling with children at all hours. Like “blue car” syndrome, it seemed every child he saw had some feature that reminded him of Rowan—brown hair, blue eyes, books in hand, mothers with children in their arms, and the list went on. His mind was gearing up for parenthood, and he couldn’t help but imagine watching his own children play in this very park.

July saw their engagement as well as Rowan’s birthday. Her parents had come to visit to celebrate both events together—they lived several hours away so she saw them infrequently. Her father had been quite a quick and intelligent man in his prime working as an engineer and mathematician, but in his older age an illness of memory-loss threatened to erase his cherished memories. Loki had never heard of such a malady. It broke Rowan’s heart to watch the condition take her father, and it was a struggle for her each time she visited with him. Thankfully her father was cognizant enough to remember the purpose of his visit. She was scared of the day he would no longer recall her name or their relationship. Her mother was usually nitpicky and overbearing, yet she seemed to grant Rowan a reprieve given the occasion. Rowan assured Loki her mother would find some fault with him before the month was out, which she had, of course—”Why doesn’t he have a proper job like everyone else? You’ve got to have a steady income to support a family!” Loki’s income had grown exponentially after achieving the good graces of several well-paying clients—what a rude woman for a mother-in-law!

Had he really been here almost a year? His sense of time had changed when Odin made him a mortal. A year on Earth was not  the same as a year in Asgard since time passed differently between the realms. And a year in Asgard would not age him as it had the past year on Earth as a human. Time was quite different now.

He almost had the park to himself except for another dog-walker and several joggers passing through. He let Athena lead him down a tree-covered gravel path and slowed a few paces in when he realized he was no longer alone.

“A child could sense they were being watched in this small area. May as well walk with me.”

Nick Fury, Director of the U.S. agency for Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division or S.H.I.E.L.D., approached him and fell in beside Loki with Athena between them. He was a tall, black man of a similar height as Loki clothed in a black trench coat, gloves, and eye patch. His demeanor brooked no nonsense.

The Director glanced down at the dog and reached out to pet her before clasping his hands thoughtfully behind his back instead.

“Beautiful dog. I wouldn’t expect someone like you to care for an animal when I’ve seen you control and kill humans indiscriminately.”

“Do leave the past in the past, Director. As for animals, I appreciate form and beauty. Hounds are poetry in motion, living artwork. And to observe their grace is quite calming.” Very aware of Fury’s tension, he added tongue-in-cheek, “Walk a dog, Director. You would benefit from such an experience.”

Fury only glared ahead. “My profession leaves no time for pets.”

Loki smiled, “I assume you have not come to discuss my taste in dogs. Why are you here?”

“I came to ask the same of you. Why are you here?” Fury’s voice threatened to pounce, a step away from his emotional namesake.

“I live here,” Loki answered coolly. ”Given your extensive resources, surely you were aware of my presence the day I arrived almost a year ago. You must have been watching me with intent or you would have hauled me in last autumn.”

“Of course we’ve been tracking you. Thor briefed us of your situation. But I don’t believe you’re here just to walk your dog and edit your girlfriend’s books.”

“Betrothed,” he corrected gently with a touch of admiration in his voice. “It would seem your files need updating. We were engaged not two months past, and we are expecting a child next spring. Director, I am just another human making his way in the world. You shall have no trouble from me,” he added resolutely.

Fury chided him heatedly, “Trouble from just another human? Just humans couldn’t possibly cause any trouble, could they? Or don’t you see all the problems on the news that all these just humans cause?”

“Director Fury,” Loki said more sternly, yet still a vision of calm. “I was rather enjoying some quality time with Athena. If you have need of me, ask. If not, I bid you farewell.”

In response Fury produced a file from his coat and read a short summary to Loki, “‘Loki aka Loki Odinson. Former Prince of Asgard and God of Deception. Current status: Human, Private Consultant.’ What does a ‘private consultant’ really do, Mr. Odinson?” Fury’s tone suggested he was conducting an interrogation rather than walking through a park on a sunny afternoon.

Unperturbed by Fury’s questioning, Loki answered easily, “I am contracted by individuals or companies to improve their existing systems or assist in the design of more efficient arrangements. People pay well for honest feedback and optimization of their affairs. I am quite capable at providing both.”

“And who is your typical clientele?”

“I’ve worked for all types: grandmothers, CEO’s, entrepreneurs, soccer mothers, major manufacturers, even city governments. Working for locals grants me the most satisfaction, though. It is gratifying to see efficiency at work, even if humans are the ones executing it. And of course being respected for my prowess is pleasing as well.”

“How do I know you aren’t secretly plotting evil on the side in your little downtown apartment?”

Loki chuckled, “I assure you, my hatred has been well-leashed.” He visibly tugged on Athena’s leash with a small smile. “After battling for possession of my own mind, it has been easy by comparison keeping destructive urges under control. That which does not kill us only makes us stronger.”

The reality was that he was unsure of where his madness-induced hatred had gone. Was it wrapped in the hollow void he’d felt since coming to Earth? The hollowness had lessened in strength and intensity, muffled by the new life he now prized and devoted himself to wholly. Perhaps with time the emptiness would become overgrown completely.

Fury sighed begrudgingly, “I didn’t want to come out here—”

“Then feel free to take your leave,” Loki interjected fluidly, but not unkindly.

“But I had to talk to you for myself. I had to know that you had really changed, that you were no longer a threat. I thought my reports had the wrong guy until your face turned up in the local paper repeatedly for helping local businesses become more prosperous.” Fury stopped, taking a moment to himself for emphasis. “Loki, your skills, prior experience, and knowledge may be an asset to Earth if certain events come to pass.”

This is the moment I had hoped would never come.

Loki’s hesitance mirrored Fury’s, “I have attempted to lay low, Director. And while I may owe you a debt, I do not want to endanger the lives of my family. We live a content life that I would prefer stay that way.” He stroked Athena’s soft, short coat absently.

“It won’t stay that way if our target has a hand in, quite literally, what we think he does. If you intend to put up that white picket fence and keep walking your dog, you might want to take a stand with the rest of us humans since you claim to be one now. I have an offer for you.”

Loki glanced out across the bay with a sigh. This space was his home—downtown, the park, his apartment with Rowan, the many businesses he’d helped, and all the friends, however casual, he’d made. All of his effort the past year would be lost, his new life would be erased.

I will forsake all of this should I choose to become the hero... I still hold there is no reward in it.  

“What is your offer, Director? I cannot promise I will accept, but I will hear it.”

“We’re willing to forgive your crimes against Earth if you agree to gather information for us concerning one of your previous benefactors. You’ll be able to travel and expand your business as you wish without fear of retribution as long as it’s legal—live the American Dream if that’s what you want. But If you don’t accept...I can’t promise I can hold back the higher-ups forever if they intend to find you. Here.” Fury handed the file to Loki before exiting the park. “Look that over for a while and get back to me.”

What could possibly be at stake that S.H.I.E.L.D. would forgive my failed subjugation of their planet?

Loki quickly skimmed the file. After a short biography of himself, the aforementioned newspaper articles, candid pictures of Rowan and him, and the scant information S.H.I.E.L.D. had gathered regarding the Chitauri, he saw a report of a relic that should have been stored safely in Asgard, but had gone missing—the Infinity Gauntlet.

“S.H.I.E.L.D. has no idea what they are dealing with.” Loki tucked the file under his arm and walked Athena back toward his apartment, toward his napping Rowan who could not know of the file’s existence. Suddenly the future looked darker than he had anticipated.

**********

Loki returned to the apartment and released Athena from her leash upon entering. The greyhound loped gracefully to the couch where she proceeded to relax across the length of it. He was thankful Rowan was in the bedroom asleep else she would have fussed at the dog to lounge elsewhere. Loki took no issue with the dog’s sleeping habits, but he did take issue with Rowan’s health. He had become overly protective of her since discovering she was pregnant.

Rather than rouse Rowan he went to his old bedroom that had become his office space several months previous. It became necessary to maintain records once he began to attract the attention of more high profile clients. He had donated all the old furniture to a second-hand shop and purchased proper supplies and furniture to assist his growing business. He stared at the file Director Fury had given him for a long moment before placing it at the bottom of a drawer in his desk.

There is no reward in playing the hero.

He left his office, Director Fury’s offer buried in his thoughts just like the file in his desk. He glanced across the hallway to the room that had become Rowan’s work space after she evicted James over 9 months ago, much to James’s displeasure. Rather than move into a smaller apartment, they had decided to keep this one for the space it would allow them. Rowan quit her bookkeeping job once she landed her book contract and now used the room as a place to write. Her book had been picked up by a publisher after only a few months and was scheduled to be released this winter. Now she spent most of her time fleshing out short stories for a planned collection and reviewing cookbooks for the local paper’s Arts section.

He was very proud of her progress and accomplishments. He had come into her life and acted as a catalyst for change and action—the very essence he desired to embody.

They shared what used to be just Rowan’s bedroom. And of course Athena had claimed the living room for her own.

Just this week, though, they had decided that her office would now become the baby’s room, so Rowan had begun boxing her materials to move to Loki’s office. He loved the way change felt—changes of improvement, that is. It was refreshing and empowering.

Rather than return to the living room, he gave in to his urge to peek on Rowan. He entered their bedroom quietly, admiring her sleeping form as he sat beside her on the bed. She did not stir.

Only three months along, it was not outwardly obvious that she was pregnant, yet it was taking its toll on her body all the same. Food sensitivities and fatigue were in full effect, and she had been thankful to be out of her day job so that afternoon naps could easily be taken.

“Such a heavy sleeper you are, my dearest,” he murmured softly with a smile. Often he talked to her while she was asleep since he slept little.

He placed a hand lightly on her shoulder, imagining what their lives would be like six months, a year, five years from now. They were all brief thoughts, but each gave him a distinct feeling of pride and the promise of stability, prosperity, and happiness. The thought of becoming a father brought him near to elation and made him smile when he spoke of it to others. He would not allow his children to suffer as he had. He would not repeat Odin’s mistakes. He would be the father he should have had.

“I cannot imagine any other woman as the mother of my children. If you can show patience for me, I do not doubt you will show the same for our children. How many children would be best? 2? 3? I vow they shall have the best education offered. It is a shame they cannot be raised under Asgard’s educators—there is no better education in all the nine realms.”

He sat with her a while longer, lost in reveries of fantastic possibilities for their children. They were comforting thoughts that seemed both reasonable and unorthodox at the same time, but that was how his world of possibilities operated. It was the world in which he felt comfortable.

He finally decided to leave her to the rest of her nap while he researched for one of his client’s projects.

“Enjoy the rest you can get now. Parenting will be a challenge.”

The basis of their relationship was a perfect complement. Loki had helped Rowan take action to change her life, and Rowan helped Loki find purpose in his life. They had truly been fortunate to find one another.

*************

Even though Rowan no longer worked at Coastal Shore Interiors, the two of them still frequented the roof of its building every few weeks. It had become a sort of tradition or date night, their area to relax outdoors when everywhere was busy. Mister Joe, the security guard in the building’s lobby, had no problem admitting them after hours since he knew them personally.

Sitting atop the roof ledge, they surveyed the few visible stars. Lately Rowan had begun many philosophical conversations, and it looked as if tonight would be no different.

“What happens after an Asgardian dies? Is Valhalla a real place?”

“Indeed it is. When an Asgardian warrior falls honorably in battle they are ushered to Valhalla by one of the Valkyries. From there he may choose to reincarnate as a mortal, observe the universe, or watch over beings’ lives.”

“Can humans go to Valhalla? Can humans choose how they want to reincarnate?”

“Great human warriors have been known to be taken to Valhalla, but I do not know if it still occurs. As for reincarnation, it is possible humans may have the same choices, but I am unfamiliar with the protocol of the mortal afterlife. It was never relevant to my endeavours.”

Rowan nodded slowly, lost in thought. “What would you choose?”

He found her lack of knowledge endearing, yet her question stumped him. For all his love of future plans, he currently had none beyond this life. He had no greater ambitions for the nine realms. He had no intentions outside of growing his relationship with his family and the challenges a mortal life posed. It felt more productive to narrow his focus and specialize rather than spread his attention over too great a span of time.

“For the moment,” he tightened his hold around her waist, “I’m content to worry only of Rowan and Loki in this life. And speaking of this life, I have a wish that I hope you will agree to.”

“Anything as long as it doesn’t involve eating meat. Blech.” Red meat had been off the grocery list for weeks along with eggs and chicken. He never realized one could make so many dishes using beans, but it’s what Rowan could stomach, and he’d suffer anything for her—even copious amounts of beans.

“I wish for us to visit Asgard to receive my father’s blessing. Even though I no longer desire my place as Prince, I feel it would give me some closure if Odin would acknowledge my accomplishments. Even after all that has happened,” he paused to take a deep breath, “I am still his son.”

The thought was no longer as bitter as it used to be. He could rightfully claim either surname he wished—Laufeyson or Odinson—yet since coming to Midgard this time he had chosen Odinson. Inside him still lived a young man who craved recognition and approval from his father, the All-father.

“Really? You think you’re ready for that?” She leaned back against his chest, and he rested his chin on top of her head.

“Yes. I am well-adjusted to my life here. Visiting is merely a nagging feeling that I wish to satisfy. I leave it to you to decide the best time should you desire such a trip. What is your wish?”

“Are you kidding? Of course I want to go! You think I’d pass up a chance to see Asgard’s great library? Or the glistening fountains? Or the royal gardens?” At Rowan’s request Loki had shared stories of Asgard with her on numerous occasions. She sat up so she could face him to properly express her exuberance. “Do you think I would miss a chance to meet your mother and father? Frigga and Odin! Do you think I could bake something for them? Would that be proper?”

Loki chuckled lightly. “Such a gift from you would not offend. It is actually customary for visitors staying in the royal palace to bring a ‘house gift,’ and a personal gift is more respectful. So it would seem you have the right of it.”

She pulled out a small notebook to scratch down ideas. “I have to start thinking about what to make. Are your parents allergic to anything? Nevermind, you can tell me later. I’ll go down to the market tomorrow to see what’s in season and go from there.”

“We do not have to go immediately. Would you not wish to wait until you are more able to—”

“Able to eat more? Nah. Don’t worry about what I’ll eat. I’m worried about impressing your parents. Which fruits do they like?”

Loki only shook his head, knowing it was useless to interrupt her train of planning now that she had a creation taking shape in her mind.

In the back of his mind he hoped Fury’s request could go unanswered. He would not forsake his life as it was now.