Nov 18, 2009

Still in the Aether

I feel as if you are waiting for me
Patiently biding your time until the right moment
We haven't met before
Yet I know your name, but nothing else
I wonder what you're like...
How does your laugh sound?
Will you be ambitious or cautious?
A feeler or thinker?
A sensate or intuitive?
What do you want to do with your life?
Which lessons have you chosen to learn?
Whenever you are ready, I will be waiting
I will know you when I see your eyes

Nov 13, 2009

Strangers -- Portishead

Ohh........
Can anybody see the light
Where the morn meets the dew and the tide rises
Did you realise, no one can see inside your view
Did you realise, forwhy this sight belongs to you

Ohh........
Just set aside your fears of life
With this sole desire

Done it warning
Done it now
This ain't real
On in this side

Done it warning
Done it now
This ain't real
On in this side

Done it warning
Done it now
This ain't real

Done it warning
Done it now
This ain't real
On in this side

Ohh............
Can anybody see the light
Where the morn meets the dew and the tide rises
Did you realise, no one can ever see inside your view
Did you realise, forewhy this sight belongs to you

A Content Explantion of Past Foresight

What have I done?
The avenue I chose was admittedly tragic in every sense of the word. It was the swiftest, most ironic opportunity that I possibly could have seized. Why? Well, what would you have done with evil in one hand and death in the other? Death was the lesser of two evils. I would have died anyway bearing what I carried. My will would not have withstood bringing such a thing into being. I am sorry to have caused you grief. It's no one's fault that it happened. If it's any consolation, I felt safe in your arms before I left.
I chose where I stood, therefore I chose where I fell. I made a sacrifice to prevent a dangerous outcome. It was time to move on—time to wait. When this memory came back to me so long after, I can attest that I felt comforted and relieved.

I can still feel you, even so far away.


Originally posted Decmeber 16, 2008, edited and re-posted November 13, 2009.

Nov 10, 2009

Religion

  • More and more I realize that it doesn't matter what religion you follow because we are all on our own paths. I no longer feel any distance or resentment towards others based on their beliefs.
  • I do not look down on others for their values.
  • I accept that others do not have the same opinions as me, and that it's ok for them to have said opinions. (Sometimes I become too rooted in what I believe and feel hostile or defensive because of another's opinion, but then I step back and realize that they are entitled to their own opinion.)

The White-Grey Room

I feel an urge to return to the white-grey room. The place where I shared a connection. A place that has become unused. I felt safe there. No need to be anyone but myself. No need to speak, just be.

I didn't go back because the connection was done, but maybe I'm not done with the room. What will be there if I return?

~~~~~~~

It's no longer the plain white-grey room I remember. It's the cottage.

It has wooden plank flooring with light streaming in through small windows and cracks between the wall boards. There are trees outside. I can tell that the room is sparsely decorated, but I can't really focus on any one thing in the small abode.

There is a woman with a shawl in the room, smiling at me. She's holding out her hands as if she wants me to come closer and take them. Should I?